Heaven

massage to ease the body aches away... heaven. :)

Poor Dear

He's down with the 'flu.

Just a couple of weeks more... you are almost there! *hugs*

I love you. :)

Are We Done Yet?

These past weeks saw me working up myself into a fine big P-a-n-i-c, as I started imagining boogeymen endings for things that have not been done yet.

Exams: I'm gonna fail! No time to study (busy panicking mah)! Haven't covered the chapters properly!
Wedding: We're gonna limp through the ceremony without alot of things, and no presiding Pastor to marry us! *cue dramatic music*
New home: Its still a mess!
Everything else in the world: Its just all WRONG!


The actual state of my mind was clearly questionable, as I flitted from one minor panic to another (and another) until they cluttered my mind and heart (resulting in seriously real episodes of 'omgithinkimgoingtofaintnow') to the point of exploding.

But with a little bit of quality rest and clear mindedness, everything falls into place...

Exams: Do my best and stop wasting time panicking! Even if I did fail the test, I will re-sit until my ICSA is completed.
Marriage: What me worry? The hall deco may go up in flames, no presiding Pastor takper...because God is here with us, emotions may go into a sudden funk, but what the hey.... its our 'big day', so what? We're getting married (yay)!
Home: I did what I could earlier, the rest is his problem for now. Lols.
Everything else in the world: Nothing was ever perfect in the first place, we do our own bit to improve our living, relationships and planet.

Not too bad after all, eh? :)


Now on to the kitchen! Panic takes up loads of energy. :p

One Cannot Love

When one is not loved.

Our scope and perception of love is so limited, even for us who are saved, those who 'know' how much Jesus sacrificed for us as He hung on the cross at Calvary.

We know all these in our minds, but what about our hearts?

All I know is that my scope of love is narrow still, in comparison to His.

Unimaginable

Irrational

Irritable

Argumentative

Illogical statements just to win a case


Something is on his mind, and he is not sharing it.

Could be a change of mind.
*shrugs*
One never knows of these things until it is too late.

A Brief Note

To my dearest fiance,

Don't feel bad (although you may laugh at this statement now) that you don't know me as well as other men know their fiancee, since we have only been together for 2 years or so.

My favourite type of food is Korean, my favourite food is Chee Cheong Fun. If there is tempeh, its double the fun.

My favourite movies are those that move my emotions - indie films, international movies, stories that have human meaning, and sci-fi flicks (especially those based on Sir Isaac Asimov's writings). I love TV series like 'Poirot' (based on Dame Agatha Christie's Belgian detective Hercule Poirot), anything with Dick Van Dyke in it, and any series that is creative enough to not use lustful nudity , sex scenes and visually violent scenes to sell their shows. Nudity in the artistic form is another matter, though some may confuse art for lust.
I watch cartoons to refresh my state of mind from the drudgery of continuous 'adult' work. Its my literal way of seeing the world through a child's eyes.
I love Disney's 'Princess and the Frog' not because of the corny storyline, but because the animation is hand drawn - something you don't see much of these days.

My favourite colour is green because it gives me a sense of peace.
Incidentally, though I am fond of frogs, it isn't the reason why I like the colour green so much.

I love frogs and anything to do with them, but I have yet to photograph a live one or touch it with my bare hands. I absolutely love the acronym F.R.O.G. (Fully Relying On God). It means alot to me for it is a constant reminder that I don't have to go into overdrive to do everything for everyone.

I love reading real books for their smells, textures, illustrations and writings, but I blog and Facebook so much now that I forgot to make time to just tuck myself into a comfortable chair/sofa and immerse in the wonderful stories within each book. Magazines don't really cut it, because they are full of short stories that don't continuosly link with each other.

I love singing any song that takes my fancy, but I only do that in private. I learned to play the guitar to fill in the musician role in my previous group of friends, since everyone kept remeniscing about how they used to have musicians but now they have none, and wished that they had a musician.

I really don't like to wear make up, because they cost a bomb to maintain. Normal make up brands (e.g. Maybeline, Silky Girl, Revlon) available in supermarkets and pharmacies cost me RM120 a month (not kidding you, I will show you the receipts if you still don't believe me), and that doesn't include yet the cost of make up remover lotions and skin care products.

I pop my contact lenses in before leaving the house because you like to see me without my spectacles. I'm comfortable with my spectacles because with them on, I don't have to go through the hassle of stopping what I am doing to re-wet my eyes every 2 hours.

I love taking walks in naturally green areas and inhale the different earthy and green scents of each of these places.

I love arts and crafts because I love creating things with my hands, and not because I dream of being a 'housewife'.

I day dream too, but I try not to do it when I am in a conversation with others because it may offend them or I might miss an important message.

That's all I can tell you for now. The rest is up to you to discover, and when you choose to do so, I will be waiting to share my discoveries of you.

Love,
Your fiancee

Funny

Why do you expect me to be creative when you aren't?

*puzzled*

In the Pit of My Tummy

Got a nagging feeling that something is going to happen soon.

But what?

Gong Xi Gong Xi!

Happy Chinese New Year! n_n

Annoying Cold

Apart from that, I've been pampered and spoiled rotten for the past few days. n_n

Here It Comes Again

Just when I thought it was tucked safely in the annals of the past, that feeling made a swift comeback.

It all started with moi feeling restless, listless and troubled.



Then one of my girlfriends asked "So when are you getting hitched?"


Pain.


And bit sad.


Replied somewhere along the lines of "up to the other half" before mentally shutting down (Well, of course it was an innocent question on her part. She is a lovely person).


Trying to distract myself from further thoughts of gloom and doom, I leisurely flipped the pages of today's extra-thick newspaper.


Then...




...............




....................




........................






I saw today's extra-special pullout.



Ruthlessly blaring an eye-popping photo of silver against purple from its front cover:





Maggie: God the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit help me! :(

I Spy with My Little Eye...

... a set of shiny pink plastic QWERTY keys! :D

Another early Christmas pressie, this one is from my dearest. :)

My first QWERTY handphone, from CSL.
Belilah barangan buatan Malaysia! n_n

My dearest told me that its a toy for me to play with, until I get my new handphone.


Let's see how long this unit will last under my not-so-gentle handling. ;p

Early Christmas Pressie :)

A sweet & thoughtful gift from my dearest's parents. n_n

Kasihan...

...Sayang jatuh sakit.

My Love

Love

Like a gentle stream

serene

cool

warm

sparkles

refreshing

wholesome

tender

caring

Firm as a rock

Love

n_n

Maggie: Sayangku. :)

So Full!

Both literally and figuratively. :)

I love this long weekend! n_n

Peace at Last?

The past three days have been a sorry state, because the truth was sidestepped and my integrity and character got attacked by that person who decided to throw a smoke screen on the whole issue.

Was truly miffed, but still was advised by those who regularly deal with that person to just apologise.

I was reluctant, but did it anyway.

And felt a deep sense of peace after that (not immediately after though), knowing that all judgment ultimately belongs to my Lord.

Thanks to all my friends, my dearest Nic and my mum for their moral and emotional support. :)

Those Three Little Words

Feels like ages since it came out so naturally (and without any prompting) from him.

And now, it feels just so strange.

I want to tell it to him so very much, but the huge pause is always present.


It is physical/mental tiredness, or just tiredness in our relationship?

Or am I not doing what is expected of me?

So Not In The Mood

If you asked me right now whether I am sure that this is what I really want with my life, I can't.

I feel tired.

And unappreciated.

Could be just the popular 'female-mood-swing' at work.

Or not.


Need more sleep.


But first, off to the kitchen to bake a batch of cream cheese cookies. :)